I swear if Carter had 11 fingers, he’d be the happiest kid on earth. You see, he has recently taken up chewing his fingernails and fingers. He evens tries to chew his toenails (little dude is very flexible). It is down right scary how far down he has chewed them. The kid just won’t quit. We get a lot of advice from parents and doctors: “Don’t draw attention to it”; “He’ll grow out of it”; “My kids did the same thing”; “Try something bitter”; “Try something hot”.
We’ll, we’re working on it, but so far things have been interesting.
Experiment 1: Tobasco. The milder, but still spicy, green sauce. Carter: “More!”
Experiment 2: Vinegar, aka “naughty water”. Carter: “More!”
Experiment 3: Pickled jalapenos. Carter: “More!”
Experiment 4: Dawn dish soap. Carter: “More!”
Experiment 4: Tonic water (quinine). Carter: “More!”
(Are you sensing a pattern here?)
Experiment 5: Tobasco, this time habanero. The sinus clearing stuff. Carter: “That’s hot. More!”
We are now using a cayenne pepper-based fingernail polish. It seems to be moderating things somewhat, but he’s still chewing away. But I have a sense that even a Ghost Pepper wouldn’t stop this kid.
As a father and a man known for his love of all things above 100,000 on the Scoville scale, I don’t know whether to be proud or mortified.